Creating the Perfect Calm Down Kit

A calm down kit is a collection of sensory tools that help children shift from a dysregulated state back into a regulated one. It gives children choices and helps them learn which tools work best for their own unique nervous systems. Over time, children can build self-awareness and begin to regulate more independently.

The downstairs brain is responsible for basic survival functions like breathing, heart rate, and reacting to danger. When children feel overwhelmed, anxious, angry, or overstimulated, their downstairs brain takes over. This is the part of the brain that controls fight, flight, or freeze responses. During these moments, logic, reasoning, and problem-solving skills from the upstairs brain are temporarily offline.

The upstairs brain helps with thinking, planning, emotional regulation, and understanding consequences. But it only works well when a child is calm. When children are dysregulated, we need to help them feel safe and settled so that their upstairs brain can come back online. This is where a calm down kit comes in.

What to Include in a Calm Down Kit

Choose items that appeal to a variety of senses. Each child will respond differently, so it may take some experimentation to find the right combination. Below are ideas to get you started.

Touch:

· Soft fabric or stuffed animal (Squishmallows are the best!)

· Putty, slime, or play dough

· Fidget toys

· Weighted lap pad or shoulder wrap

· Textured stickers (aka Calm Strips)

Sight:

· Glitter jar or liquid motion timer

· Picture book or calming visual cards

· Happy family photos

· Small flashlight or color-changing light

Sound:

· Noise-reducing headphones

· Rainstick, kalimba, or tongue drum

· Music playlist with calming songs

Smell:

· Scented stickers

· Scented markers

· Essential oil roller (child-safe blends like lavender or orange)

· Scented putty

Taste:

· Something chewy (licorice, dried fruit, or a chewable necklace)

· Sour candy or gum (avoid artificial sweeteners)

Movement:

· Small trampoline or balance board

· Jump rope or resistance band

· Bubbles for deep breathing

Tips for Success

Children benefit from items that offer predictability and control. Optimize success by making sure the calm down kit is available when and where it’s needed i.e. having a separate one in the car. 

Leverage special interests to make the calm down kit more appealing.

Create the kit with your child so they feel ownership and know what’s inside.

Use the kit preventatively, not just when things escalate. This helps the child build positive associations with it.

Model using calm down tools yourself to show that everyone needs help regulating sometimes.